508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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