Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
