all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
