then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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