I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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