I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
