I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
