You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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