highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
