dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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