I showed him my bush... on skype.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
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