It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
