I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
