You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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