just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize