Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Randomize
