I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Randomize
