Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
why do cheetos always look like penises
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I got inside last night via doggy door
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
