am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
We need a shit load of segways right now
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
