So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
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