I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
