tell your sister to shave her snatch
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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