how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize