She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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