I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
