Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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