i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Randomize