fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
These tits shall not be calmed
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
