yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
my liver is dry heaving
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
