Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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