what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
