So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize