Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
