Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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