She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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