You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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