using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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