my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
