So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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