that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
You need a sexual gate keeper
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
