whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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