Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
