sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
you win again, gameday.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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