Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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