Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
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