i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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