I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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