I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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