I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
