i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
