no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
