too bad you live with your parents still
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize